Diary of a Cat Lover, Part N

All times are noted as time since having gone to bed.

4:00 - *THUMP*. Blob of fat lands on feet. Shit. They're out. A kick -- polite, but firm -- and back to bed.

4:03.10 - "Meow." Go away.

4:03.30 - *THUMP*. He's trying to be cute, or something. KICK -- harder. But still polite. What was I dreaming about again?

4:04 - *THUMP*. *KICK*. Hmmm. Maybe he wants food.

4:05 - *SNAP!* OWWW! He's like a walking capacitor*. Stupid, hairy animals.

4:06 - Moistness on face. "GET... AWAY, STINKY!" I hear blob hit the ground and run off a short distance.

4:07 - I can hear him rubbing himself on the fabric chair close to my head. He's recharging.

4:08 - Tail-to-foot contact again. *SNAP!* Dammit. I'll bet you could see the spark that time.

4:09 - Yet another sudden transfer of electrons. "Fucking cat!" Yes, I said that out loud.

4:10 - *THUMP*. Back on the couch. Doesn't he know I'm allergic to him? Harder kick, and he's back on the ground.

4:11 - I'm wide awake now.

4:16 - I've learned that if I blow really hard into Stinky's face, he'll keep his distance for about 20 seconds. Unfortunately, he keeps forgetting that.

4:18 - *sigh*. I might as well get up.

I love cats.



professor plum, a.k.a. "stinky," lives a lazy life underfoot

* Ai-jen might quietly remark, "nerd city!" if she heard me compare stinky to a capacitor. Tony and I get that a lot from her when we're together.